RUN DON'T WALK to Rue La La For Their Nicole Miller Bridal Sale! Seriously, GO!

So, despite my previous run-in with a HORBS Nicole Miller "special evening gown" that I thought might make a dece wedding dress (I thought wrong), I tried on several ACTUAL Nicole Miller wedding dresses this weekend at Michelle in Brooklyn Heights. My Michelle experience was great, and I really liked two of the Nicole Miller dresses I tried on. I'm not going to go with either dress because they're too "big" and "cupcakey" on me, but they did feel wonderful on, and if I wanted a big dress, I'd go that route for sure, and I'd be happy to buy from Michelle.

BUT, actually I probably wouldn't because RueLaLa.com is having a Nicole Miller bridal sale for like the next few MINUTES or something, and one of the very dresses I tried on -- the silk faille mermaid with beaded details -- on is available. Originally $2600, available at RueLaLa in sizes 0 - 16 for $650 (!!!!!!!!). SERIOUSLY! GO! GO NOW! (You need an invite to log in -- lemme know in the comments if you need me to invite you!)

($650, Nicole Miller Bridal, RueLaLa.com)

Brian Atwood Atrocity

I usually really like Brian Atwood heels (and will admit to ALMOST ALWAYS thinking of RYAN Atwood from The O.C. [RIP]), but these are both EVERY color too many and every shade of wrong:

(Apprx $574 USD, Brian Atwood, Net-a-porter.com)

I'm counting the SECONDS until they show up on Mariah Carey's feet.

Sad panda.

Bluefly Bridal Binge! Vera Wang, Bagdley Mischka And More! ROP!

I cannot even BELIEVE how many amazors potential wedding dresses Bluefly is STOCKED with right now. And by wedding dresses, I mean either non-traditional wedding dresses to wear AS your wedding dress or TO a wedding. Do BLUEFLY a favor and GET THEM OFF THEIR HANDS, okay? They're practically PAYING YOU to buy these gems! Also, apparently "just today," you can get 15% off dresses (discount taken at checkout), so DO IT!

($448, Badgley Mischka, Bluefly)

I am feeling SO many emotions about this dress, all of them POSITIVE and overwhelming. It's sorta what I was hoping for with my Nicole Miller fail, but this looks even more fantasticosa! I'm not a fan of the wrap, but no big whoop, right?

($402, Badgley Mischka, Bluefly)

Puh-retty!

($331, Badgley Mischka, Bluefly)

I'm not usually a fan of pleats like these, but I like the structured bib. Cool for alt-bridesmaids dresses!

($501, Amsale, Bluefly)

I mean, look me in the EYE and TELL me that Amsale's "Duet" gown isn't to DIE! It's simple but commanding and not overwhelming tacky. And that sexy back! LOVE! Also, short ladies, you CAN wear full gowns. And I love that this is full but not like the width of a sedan. This width is perfect for a shortie like myself.

($125, Vera Wang, Bluefly)

Definitely not for me, but if you're looking for a more traditional wedding gown, um, HI! This Vera Wang is like four cents, relatively speaking. I could see this being really purdy on a tall, thin type.

($331, Vera Wang, Bluefly)

Much better on shorties or tall types!

($400, Vera Wang, Bluefly)

Love the pretty stone color. Nice for a fall/ early winter wedding.

($324, Vera Wang, Bluefly)

I CANNOT SAY ENOUGH WONDERFUL THINGS ABOUT THIS DRESS! IT'S LIKE I MADE IT WITH MY OWN HANDS! SOMEONE BUY IT! PLEASE! LOOK HOW GORGEOUSLY EARLY '60S IT IS!!!!!!!!

($221, BCBG Max Azria, Bluefly)

EEE. Love the black-on-white detailing!

($301, Adam, Bluefly)

Wooden beads aren't so me, but this is still a super gorj beach wedding dress!

($169, BCGB Max Azria, Bluefly)

Not so me, but still really stunning -- especially that open back.

($220, BCBG Max Azria, Bluefly)

One of my favorite -- love the champagne-ness.

Hayden-Harnett Gets Ripped Off

Check it out: Copycats have discovered our fave local small fashion label. In a major, major way. Observe:



On the left you have Hayden-Harnett's extremely cute Iskia link wedge sandal; on the right you have Shoes for Lovely People's (admittedly, also cute) version. Hayden-Harnett is hoppin' mad, justifiably. The H-H originals are only $100 more though. I'd kinda rather spend the extra dough — or wait for one of 'em to go on sale.

Luckily, they have loyal eagle-eyed fashion fans, who also spotted this travesty:



On the left, H-H's awesome Havana hobo, of which I have one (which I LOVE). On the right, a crappy fake-leather version by Bandolino, available at Herzberger (whatever that is), identical down to the tiny studs on the zipper pull. Horbzburger. (Though I kinda dig the turquoise color.) One's $500; one's $66. The Havana is supersoft and lovely — if you don't have a spare $500 laying around, wait for a sample sale. It's worth it.

FashionBinge's MAJOR Ankle Boot Binge!

What with fuggo flip-flops and whatnot entering store windows for the summer season (even though I've been wearing my sleeping-bag-with-arms super-duper warm coat for the past week), it is time to STOCK UP on cute ankle boots or booties or whatever you want to call them to wear with skinny jeans, leggings, tights and skirts, or whatevs. Cheyck up on all of these great booties on SALE!

($148, Free People)

Don't LOVE the bow, but I don't hate it. Since it's monotone, it's still conspicuous enough.

($164, Jeffrey Campbell, Nordstrom)

Normally I'd say these are too too much, what with the cut-outs and the studs, but in black I think they work. I'd do it.

($200, Casadei, Footcandyshoes.com)

Everyone always freaks out over Louboutin, but PLEASE give Casadei some love, okay? They were all over the red carpet at the Oscars. They're usually three times as much, but these are just $200. Woot!

($135, Shane And Shawn, Endless.com)

These are KINDA bad but could work on the right girl... or guy.

($135, Helle Comfort, Zappos.com)

Kinda wack but they could be gorgeous on. And they've even got the word "comfort" built right in!

($184, Claudia Ciuti, Nordstrom)

Not a HUGE fan of open-toed shoes, but I do like these.

($152, Diesel, Yoox.com)

I have absolutely no use for a pair of white booties, but if I did need a pair, I'd get these.

($49, Newport News)

MADONNA PARTY!

($68, Arden B.)

Sorta springy.

($412, Casadei, Endless)

Two-tone patent leather, and suede on the vamp! Studs and metallics, blah blah, these are a few of my favorite things!! All at once! On ONE shoe! Woo!

Beautiful, Unattainable, Covetable, Nonsensical: Alexander McQueen Peacock Jacquard Dress

($3,191, Alexander McQueen, Saks)

The black and gold silk jacquard print is, of course, stunning, and OBVS I'm attracted to ANYTHING with peacock in the name, but WHO wants their ass to look like a hot air balloon:


Why wasn't this a straight A-line dress??? Why? WHY? ANSWER ME, SOMEONE!

Things that are black and gold and make more sense: Laura Mercier's Black Gold eye pencil and Sam Sparro's "Black And Gold" video:

Would You Mind If I Looked At You For A Moment? West/Feren Berkshire Hip Purse

($172, West/ Feren, Ravinstyle.com)

Two words: do me.

But before you start, save 15% with promo code “spring awakening” through March 22.

Bell Biv Devoe - New Music - More Music Videos

Newport News Shoes Take On Prada!

($39, Newport News)

A little too fairy-princessy for me, but, you know... if you're down with moonbeams and hula hoops stuff, have at it!

Here's the 2008 Spring / Summer Prada flower-heel Mary-Janes that clearly inspired them:

(Image via Shoewawa)

Vena Cava Siouxie Dress For The Non-Traditional Wedding Dress Win!

I was flipping through Anica Boutique's sale selection, marveling at how everything on sale fell under the category of either HORBSFEST (WHAT did these Mocium jeans do to deserve this???) or AWESOME SAUCE (Opening Ceremony silk bustier dress that's just $142), when I stumbled across this PORTRAIT OF PERFECTION:

($628, Vena Cava, AnicaBoutique.com)

Size 6 only. Now don't get me wrong -- $628 doesn't seem like much of a sale to me. But I've been dropping that bridal acid that has my brain tripping balls into believing that like, $3,000 is a somewhat reasonable price to pay for ONE item that you will wear exactly ONCE. Evar. So, relatively speaking, $628 is a STEAL. Isn't that funny how that works? In REAL FUCKING LIFE I'd NEVER EVER spend $628 on one dress, but in bizarro bridalville, I'm like OOH NO PROB! SO THAT'S A VISA, AND THE FIRST FOUR NUMBERS ARE... MKAY GREAT!

Anyway, this silk dress is so sweet my teeth fucking hurt. It's got such a perfect 1950s feel (while the detailing's a little '70s), and the shoe options blow my mind and then come back for seconds. I love how clean and crisp it is and how it flatters any figure. It's also a perfect dress if you're doing a tiny, private ceremony at a court house or city hall or something. Or a small beach or lakefront wedding. No reason you shouldn't have a great dress too. And pay a lot for it too! :P

BTW, oh HAI! Same dress, size 4 and 6, $300 at Basic Boutique! Also, check DressBoston.com -- they might have it.

FashionBinge Partially Retracts Its Previous Position On FRINGE Due To These Minnetonka Boots

Maybe it's because I've started smoking crack regularly now or because I'm a flagrant hypocrite or both, but not only do I love these black suede fringed (FRINGED!) Minnetonka boots, but I'm WEARING THEM RIGHT NOW. And guess what? They're comfy, and they REWL.

($83, Minnetonka, Tobi.com)

I saved 10% with coupon code "10GRECHEN," and I think because of where they come to on my leg -- just to the bottom of my calves -- they're super slimming with black skinny jeans. I know I've hated on fringe before, and um, I basically still stand by that -- especially brown fringe (shudder!), and any and all fringe jackets, I can pretty much patently, across the board say I reject. But these black fringe Minnetonka boots are the jumpoff. Act straight.

Size 2 Non-Traditional Wedding Dress? Done! (Also, Please Don't Starve Yourself Down To A Size 2, Okay?)

($270, Jay Godfrey, Bluefly.com)

Size 2? Sweet! Check this Jay Godfrey white silk dress that could easily double as a pretty little white dress (LWD) for you super teensy non-traditional wedding dress-seeking brides. (Only available in size 2, sadly.) Anyway, it's perfs for a beach wedding. The bow is like "Hi! I'm a bridaly present!" Oh, and speaking of brides and wedding dresses and being a size 2 -- I'm not a size 2! And it's ok! I'm not gonna be a size 2. Ever. Especially not for my wedding. So please, guys, don't hop on the bridal bulimia train or do some crazy juice fasts or whatever to slim down for four seconds only to gain it all back teh second a delicious crab cake touches your desperate lips. Lift some weights or whatever, but don't forget to eat food, okay? Otherwise you could pass out at best, get really fucking sick at worst. You kinda need to keep eating food! Bonus: It's delicious!


Better idea: The Garth Brooks Juice Diet!

Edressme's White Sale and Reception-Dress Dreams

So my dreams of a reception costume change continue to pop up, despite having The Dress. Perhaps I can change just prior to the afterparty? Not least because of edressme's Simply White sale, which knocks 20% off their white dresses, of which they have a bunch. Some of them unfortunately look like Mandee's rejects, the stuff of spandex nightmares, but here are my picks:


Kirribilla "Deirdre" minidress, on sale for $272. Those sleeves are amazing, and sharp shoulders are totally in!



Another cute offering from Kirribilla, the "Selene" dress, $316, with gorgeous ruffled collar, and bonus: pockets!



This ecoskin Ecoskin dress, $116, is floaty but fitted: a perfect combo. And while it's not much of a party dress, I suppose, it would be just so chic for a trip to the courthouse.


That's it for things I like from edressme, but look at what I found at asos:



Miss Milne Layered Frill Sleeve Dress, $91.22. I always LOVE tiered dresses and then they look like crap on me, though. Maybe this one would be different, because it has a waist tie??

Whaddaya think, peanut gallery?

Peacock Prom Dress DISASTER!

($500, Jovani, eDressme.com)

I've put it out there before that I LOVE peacock ANYTHING and EVERYTHING. Peacock dresses, earrings, tops, whatever. But this "peacock prom dress" is an egregious affront on my senses. If I were a peacock, I'd be highly offended. Also, I love how it's not returnable. Um, because clearly they DON'T want this piece of peacock shit back. Also, my prom was like a MILLION years ago, and also, I didn't go, but I'm PRETTY sure that while there had to have been some regrettable picks, NO ONE would've showed up in this overly literally interpretation of one of nature's most beautiful feathered creature.

+ More prom dress messes.
+ More PEACOCK FASHION!

Erin Fetherston Dream Dress + My Trip To Mark Ingram Bridal Atelier

Ok, sure, it's fucking see-through, but this Erin Fetherston Spring 2009 RTW dress is so floaty and ethereal that I can't help but fantasize about it as an amazing option for a non-traditional wedding dress, you know? Bonus: it looks like a wedding cake, AND it's the color of gay unicorns!

In other bridal news, after my Nicole Miller fail and my thanks-but-no-thanks trip to Kleinfeld, I MAY have found a wedding dress! It's, um, more costly than the Nicole Miller dress yet still "less" (and note: less is in quotes) than a lot of the wedding dresses I've seeing in bridal mags. It's at the Mark Ingram Bridal Atelier, where Kelsey, the manager, really really helped me out. It was just a MUCH more up-to-date experience than Kleinfeld. I didn't feel pressured, and the whole experience was a lot more inviting yet low-pressure at the same time. I don't know. If I'm gonna drop > 1 month's rent, I'd rather do it at Mark Ingram... We'll see!! 

I Think I Want Cork Wedge Shoes!

($98, 80%20, Urban Outfitters)

I do. I do want a pair of super '70s cork wedges. Sue me!

Bridal Binge, Shoe Edition, Vol. 2

As I look and look for the perfect weddin' shoe (see volume 1, wherein I bemoan the price of the perfect shoe), the shoe craving grows stronger.



Botkier "Elena" ruffle sandal, $445. This could've been a wedding contender (if not for the price): the perfect shade of teal! And yet maybe a little boxy...but LOVE that ruffle.

These are also possibly in my wedding colors, but possibly too wacky even for me:



Betseyville "Pabla" sandal, $114.95.

I'm sorta leaning toward agreeing with Tamar, who posted this one some time ago as a possible cute-ass wedding shoe:



Melissa Anglomania Plus Melissa Lady Dragon in Metallic White rubber slingback, $149. Nothing says "lifetime commitment" like technologically engineered thermoplastic, right?

I seem to have a hankering in my heart, when I look at wedding shoes, for red ones. But red isn't among my wedding colors. Maybe I can make it so? As an accent with teal and aqua? Say I can! Then I can get these, maybe:



Poetic Licence "Frills" sandal, $115.95. Check out the soles!

Or these:



Delman "Sema" sandal, $160.99 (and only in size 7).

Or these:





Nina "Camaren" knotted-toe slingback, $79.95.

Or these:



Luichiny "Duchess" sandal, $69.95, although I don't care for the mirrored heel.

Uh, you get the drift. And I haven't even *looked* at Zappos yet! Questions, advice, catty remarks?

Just Checking...

Did everyone see Michelle Obama's blue suede boots?



Sorta hilariously charming, right? It's nice to know that even a superstar first lady has some duds in her closet. And she WAS building a house, after all.

Target Has a Fine Jewelry Department?

Don't worry. I'm not getting this. But for a sec, I thought this would make kind of a cool, funky wedding ring, maybe for someone with a square-ish engagement ring. And hello! Seriously budget-friendly!



Target 10-karat white gold .25 carat diamond ring, on clearance for $83.99.

The quality is obviously not going to be great. You don't even need to read the review to know that. But I might get a real jeweler to do something like that, though. And hey, this one doesn't resemble any genital parts that I'm aware of!

BB Dubs Sample Sale (and One Cool Piece)

It seems I have another chance at scoring more Built by Wendy stuff at sample-sale prices, this time in person:



One awesome item that won't be there, in all likelihood, is this supersweet cotton dress, so perfect for spring (from the spring line, duh):



Built by Wendy patio stripe pleated minidress, $214.

Spring fashion fever is setting in, y'all!

Dolce Vita Is Trying to Kill You

Dolce Vita "Oliva" platform, $99.99. Four and a half inches plus a one-inch platform, people. Be careful out there!

The First Wedding Ring I Really Like

Wedding bands are so boring. A circle of diamonds? Snooze. I want something simple, sure, but with a twist. Perhaps literally. We'll see. But tonight I found this awesome, awesome ring, with a little hidden diamond. You can wear it with the diamond facing you, or so it's facing out. I'd probably keep it as my little secret. I'm comforting myself with the fact that it's wider than I think I want a band to be, because goddamn, this thing is over $5k. (That's the price for platinum, and I want a silver metal; yellow gold is obviously cheaper, but it doesn't come in white gold.) Isn't it excellent, though?





Neissing "Refuge" ring, $2864 for yellow gold and $5552 for platinum 6mm bands.

Anybody got any tips on sources for unusual wedding bands like this?

UPDATE: I am further comforted by a friend's reference to this ring as both "wacky" and "Diamond Clitoris."

Fergie's Black and Orange Patent Jimmy Choos = Full-On FIERCY!

Honestly, I'm like meh about Fergie. Like, live your life Fergs, I'll live mine, best of luck, whatevs. But I DO EFFING LOVE these black and orange patent Jimmy Choos she just wore to the March of Dimes 34th Annual Beauty Ball in NYC the other night.


IF I could afford Jimmy Choos (I cannot), I'd wear these with some sort of black one-piece jumpsuit, sorta similar to this Free People one, perhaps:

($88, Free People)

Except minus the flowy pant, PLUS the... TOP THAT DOESN'T SHOW GRATUITOUS BREASTAGE.

(Images via Just Jared)

Muppet Mania! Jean-Charles de Castelbajac's Full-Frontal Frog Fashions At Paris Fashion Week

Jean-Charles de Castelbajac's Paris Fashion Week show was inspired by Andy Warhol and ended up being a salute to the late, great Jim Henson. I mean, you hardly even notice this chick's not wearing a shirt under her collection of dead Kermit the Frogs!

Avant-garde pop art designer Jean-Charles de Castelbajac, also known as JC/ DC, designed the teddy bear coat Madonna wore in the '80s, back when she was still fun, he designed Eddie Murphy's costumes in Coming to America, and Katy Perry's wore his fun cartoon eye dress to the 2008 MTV Europe Awards.

Sorry, but if you don't see the humor in Jean-Charles de Castelbajac's designs, then hold a mirror up to your mouth and check to make sure you're breathing.

Images via WWD.

(Image via: Redcarpetfashionawards.com)

On Trend: What Comes Around Goes Around Copa Maxi Dress

I'm still slightly on the fence about maxi dresses for my own body type: I'm short, errr... chesty, and super curvy, and I'm not certain I really wanna deal with wearing a strapless bra under something that isn't super formal. A night in the painful, annoying infrastructure of a strapless is an investment. I don't know if I wanna cash in those chips on a cotton maxi dress that looks like beachwear, you know? BUT, in theory and for those who don't have strapless issues and can just throw on a maxi dress, the What Comes Around Goes Around Copa maxi in ecru comes highly recommended.

($240, What Comes Ar0und Goes Around)

I love the metallic threading -- definitely elongating for us shorties. Also, if some of you are like "Hm. But what do I wear with a maxi dress?" Well, I really love the idea of wearing a maxi dress with a little denim jacket, a fun patent clutch -- grey, in this case -- and some easy, breezy leather thongs. Possibly with little tiny silver studs. And yes, $240 is kinda a lot for a maxi, but check What Comes Around Goes Around, because they do put their stuff on sale pretty frequently. Oh yeah, I could kinda justify spending that if I were wearing this to a casual outdoor summer wedding. (As a guest, that is.) Do it!

Chanel? No. Obey? Yes!

I love this black quilted laptop bag inspired by Chanel's classic black quilted bag:

($96, Obey, Karmaloop)

Sure, it's Obey and not Chanel, but it's also not like $2,000. AND, it's got a tiny row of pyramid studs! SCORE! You can get it at Karmaloop, where promo codes are a dime a dozen! And I like dimes, and I like dozens.

+ Try any of these Karmaloop promo codes:
MO9333 = 20% off
MS29093 = 20% off
KH28064 = 20% off
JK28278 = 20% off

Skittles Jacket: Taste The... Bad Taste

($129, HollywoodMegaStore.com)

I actually saw someone wearing this Skittles jacket today. It's available in up to size 6X Large. Taste the depression.

Ridiculous but fun food-inspired fashion by Agatha Ruiz De La Prada:

(Via EatMeDaily)

+ More photos of Agatha Ruiz De La Prada's Fall 2009 fashion show at Coutorture.

Ettika Bracelets: Bold! Bright! Stacked!

You thought that subhed was about me, right? You're half right. So, speaking of fun, you know what's more fun than having one of something? Having like seven or eight of something. Which is why you need to get your... um, wrist... on not one, not two, but many many many braided satin cord bracelets by L.A. designers Ettika (Ettie and Joey Rafaeli).

You can customize the bracelet you want -- choose from pastels, florescents, and rainbow variations. AND, you can pick your own cute little 18-karat gold-dipped or silver charms. I love the seahorse, the wishbone and the little skull and crossbones, and I'm all for the mix-and-matchiness of wearing pastels and neons together. Why not? Also, careful buyer recession-spending note: each end of each bracelet is reinforced, so no worries about them falling off/ apart.

Each braided Ettika charm bracelet is $24, the satin cord wrap bracelets with one charm are $20, and the braided wrap bracelets are $70.

Hippity Hop -- Roos Return!

Anyone remember KangaRoos shoes? As in Roos? With the little secret pocket? SURELY you had a pair of the Velcro ones with the little zippy pocket back in the day? (I did. I think they were suede fuchsia... or maybe I'm thinking of my Punk Brewster sneakers, which were EVERY color, including fuschia.) Currently, these are some of my very favorite sneakers -- Roos Full Court hi-tops. Do NOT even LOL. Or whatever, LOL all you want, but they're extremely comfy and they look great with skinny jeans and a longer tee. Seriously. They're about $69 at Zappos, but for some reason, I can't find them on Zappos at this moment in our lives. Will research and report back in kind. UPDATE: Zappos should have them April 1st! Until then, check them out on the Norwegian Kangaroos site, so you at least know they do exist and that I didn't make them up. But if you have any sneaker streak in you, get these. I've already run through one pair and may need to reup. You should too.

And check out SneakerFreaker for info on KangaRoos' Walter Payton-inspired hi-tops.

Oh Look! THERE's My Waist... In 7 For All Mankind Charlize Jeans

($215, 7 For All Mankind, Macys.com)

So, it turns out I DO have a waist! I had COMPLETELY forgotten! Because, like an idiot, I've been wearing my jeans at like, Kevin Federline lower depths, all down around my hips and shit. Not like total B-girl or anything, but it HAS been awhile since I've gotten new jeans, and some of my older ones are, um, well loved and not exactly crispy?

Fortunately, I recently got a pair of 7 For All Mankind's new Charlize trouser jeans in the dark Soho wash, and they're sitting high and dry, accentuate my waist, and lifting my flat rear without cutting off circulation in any crucial places where circulation really needs to happen. The Charlize jeans are thick, slightly stretchy, ultra slimming, and suck you in and keep you there. They're professional but not in a boring way. And the craziest/ best part is that they're super comfortable. Of course, I had to get about 18,002 inches taken up, but there's still a nice flare there that doesn't venture into "C'mon Get Happy" Brady territory. Essentially, much like the woman they're named for, 7 For All Mankind's Charlize jeans are perfection.

Oddly, I'm Drawn To This Leather T-Shirt From Slow And Steady Wins The Race

($188, Slow And Steady Wins The Race, Urban Outfitters)

Deconstructionist quasi-couturier Slow And Steady Wins The Race has united leather and the t-shirt -- two tastes that don't usually taste together but ultimately do here. Get it at Urban Outfitters, and wear it with everything.

Hayden-Harnett Opens Up Shop In Nolita AND BO-HO Sale!

Hayden-Harnett news! Firstly, my very favorite indie designer opened up their first Manhattan shop!

The new Hayden-Harnett boutique is located at 253 Elizabeth St between Houston and Prince St
(212) 334-2247, open daily noon—8pm.

You can celebrate its opening in one of two you-valued ways: You can print out and carry along the above coupon and save 15% on in-store purchases through April 7, OR, you can have a veritable "Shoegasm" and buy one pair, get one half off through Sunday, March 15th with promo code "shoeme."

+ Check out photos from Hayden-Harnett's Fall-Winter '09 collection.

Potential Wedding Dress Fail: Nicole Miller Strapless Silk Dress

($725, Nicole Miller, Nordstrom)

Oh Nicole Miller Strapless Two Tone Silk Gown with Train from Nordstrom. I had remotely high hopes for you. You were a perfectly silvery/ not purply color when I unboxed you. I thought my visions of being an edgy, not-boring, modern-yet-subtly '80s bride were about to come true. Except... Except. There's often an except, no? This dress looked like it was thrown together in 14 seconds using old thread and some remnant fabric. The side seams looked stretched out and appeared to be almost bursting (um, before I tried it on, okay?), and there were threads hanging off of the band at the waist. The bodice seemed to lose shape as I took it out of the bag. Also, I ordered a size 10 and I couldn't even zip it up my back, which made almost no sense because while it was big in other places, and while I could definitely stand to drop a few, I have a tiny back (my band size is 34). (HOW was that size 10? And this was a street size 10, not bizarro bridal size.)

Anyway, it was too bad because the train started in a spot that made my ass look great. Too bad the OTHER 80% OF THE DRESS WAS A COMPLETELY DISASTROUS SHIT SHOW. Truly, it had the feel of a knock-off prom dress. The fabric felt like one of those vaguely ethnic pillowcases you buy at a street fair for like $12.

$725 would've been considered a STEAL for a wedding dress, but for ANY dress at ANY price, this was made like an absolute raggy piece of garbage. (Seriously, was this a pre-worn sample? A mock-up?)

Anyway, back to Nordstrom it goes. Next?

Bridal Beauty Binge: PLEASE Get Yourself A Wedding-Day Facial From Joanna Vargas. Please.

I'm getting married in February 2010, which means I have approximately 340 days to engage in almost a year's worth of trial and error, which is basically the way I like to do things. Already I've looked at seven different venues, purchased and returned one wedding dress, tried on and rejected several more wedding dresses from one of New York's "premiere" wedding salons, attended countless wedding workshops, and had a body wrap I definitely wouldn't recommend to brides-to-be or anyone else for that matter. But the one thing I did right so far (besides say yes to my "boyfiance") was getting a facial from Joanna Vargas (that's her on the right) at her flagship salon here in New York.

Joanna Vargas looks about 12 (she's not, but she could easily pass for 22), and has the luminous skin of a just-bathed toddler who's never seen the light of the sun. So right there, you know she's doing something right. But it turns out she does EVERYTHING right; A few weeks ago, I visited her salon on Fifth Avenue and 42nd (right across from the Bryant Park tents -- she treats a lot of the famous fashion faces inside) for a customized 60-minute Red Rose Purifying Facial, and truly, my skin has never looked better.

Joanna's treatment started off with a Diamond Peel -- a form of microdermabrasion that uses a diamond-tipped wand to remove the top layer of dead skin, and while I like to think I do a decent job of cleansing and moisturizing, it is winter in New York, so I'm sure Joanna had more than enough unpleasantries to deal with. Despite the fact that I have rosacea and my skin gets hot and flares up at the mere opening of a jar of unfamiliar moisturizer, the Diamond Peel felt great, and I had no negative reaction to it or any of the treatments or organic products Joanna applied.

Next up was a vitamin-packed red rose cream cleanser, followed by an exfoliation, an herbal oil facial massage, some extractions (it happens -- don't hate), and a mask made of red rose petals, honey, and beetroot extract. One of the last steps was the oxygen process, with combines 98% oxygen with a serum made from green tea, vitamins and aloe. She sent me home covered in Eminence's Sweet Red Rose Moisturizer. And honestly, when I got home, I passed out for SEVEN HOURS because I was so relaxed. That was more than three weeks ago, and still my skin look healthier, less red, and, miraculously, the odd, slightly lumpy/ bumpy patches -- just little, not-major-but-still-annoying inconsistencies that I figured were just part of getting older -- are completely gone.

Also, I need to note that Joanna Vargas' salon is small yet totally clean and super cozy and extremely relaxing (like I said: I was so zoned out, I passed out from 5 - 12pm). And Joanna is unbelievably intelligent, down-to-earth, and easy to talk to about everything from organic products (I REALLLY need to get on that... I knew it before and she only helped convince me -- not in a scary brainwashy way -- why) to Abaete. And she didn't do any of that steam machine stuff that's absolutely made me nearly choke to death when I've gotten facials in the past. Also, another thing that makes me choke: blatant upselling. None of that here. (Thanks again, Joanna.)

Now, here's the catch, but let me explain to you why it's not really a catch. A 60-minute purifying facial with oxygen with Joanna is about $325. But PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE, brides. If you're spending $3-, $4-, even up to $5,000 if not more on your entire head-to-toe bridal suite -- dress, alterations, shoes, hair and makeup, jewelry, WTFever -- do me a favor and DO NOT skimp on your face. People are going to be kissing you, hugging you, taking photos of you, cooing and gooing all over you. Your face is WORTH $325, is it not? Same goes for you, non-engaged women who just got a new job, promoted, laid off, turned 30, turned 31, woke up on a Saturday. Whatever. Trust me when I tell you that my skin has never looked better.

And though so far I have little else than a groom, a venue, and a wedding date, I at least know that I'll be back to Joanna Vargas before I walk down the aisle.

Joanna Vargas
501 Fifth Avenue, Suite 707
New York, NY 10017
Telephone: 212-949-2350

Binge Beauty Buy: Rimmel Sexy Curves Mascara

Rimmel's newest mascara, Sexy Curves, has a wand that looks like a sex toy (OR AT LEAST I'VE HEARD THAT THAT'S WHAT THEY LOOK LIKE ON TV), and while I think you're a straight fool if you don't curl your lashes first before applying mascara, the product, much like sex toys, does a good job of, um, hitting those spots other products don't. Despite its claims, Rimmel Sexy Curves doesn't plump lashes (or at least not mine), but it definitely does a good job of lenghtening, lifting and separating, if you will, so I'd recommend it as a base before you use other thicker mascaras out there, like Napoleon Perdis' Madame Curl Curl.

+ Pick up Rimmel Sexy Curves at CVS and Target.

Somaly Mam: Bid On Beauty For A Beautiful Cause

Yo. Today is International Women's Day, and many good-hearted beauty professionals have come together and set up an eBay auction to benefit the Somaly Man Foundation -- a nonprofit public charity whose vision is to put an end to sexual slavery.

Some background on Somaly Mam: Somaly is survivor of human trafficking. Somaly was sold into sexual slavery in Cambodia by a man who posed as her grandfather, forced to work in a brothel with other young girls. Beaten, raped and tortured, she finally escaped, and at age 30, became a spokeswoman for women and children tortured in Cambodian brothels. In 2006, Somaly was honored as Glamour Magazine's Woman of the Year for her courageous work in fighting sexual slavery, and she has been profiled as a CNN Hero in recognition of her brave fight to save so many young, innocent victims from this horrible silent crime.

The auction starts today, and some of the items up for auction include:

+ Cut & color with celebrity stylist David Evangelista
+ Tickets to the Diane von Furstenberg Spring 2010 Runway show in September 2009
+ Over $1000 in Givenchy Le Makeup, skincare, and fragrance
+ The new Dior L'Or de Vie Skincare Collection
+ Autographed Anya Hindmarch handbag
+ 3-month Equinox Fitness membership
+ VIP tickets to see a live taping of Rachael Ray
+ Lots of beauty products from brands including Fresh, Guerlain. Dior, Sephora, and Frederic Fekkai!!!

I know lots of us don't have a ton of spare cash right now, but if you're looking to pick up a gift for Mother's Day, a bride, someone's birthday, and you want to be able to spend somewhere where your money can give back, this is a great way to do that.

+ Bid here! Bid high! Bid often! Good luck!

Classickicks Era Vans For Spring!

If you're a true sneaker freaker, then you know that these Vans aren't new x2. They're part of Soho boutique Classic Kicks' (298 Elizabeth St, New York, NY 10012/ 212.979 9514) joint effort with Vans to resurrect the line's Era sneakers from the late '70s. They came out in the summer of 2008, but they're still available in men's and women's sizes for $65, and their classic Crayola colors make them perfect for this early springy weather.

($65, Vans, Classickicks.com)

Olsen Haus Energy Heel

($198, Olsen Haus, Nimli.com)

I recently became aware of Olsen Haus' amazing line of vegan shoes. Now don't get me wrong, I LOVE a steak fajita, but I can't argue with the fact that these are eco-, animal-, and earth-friendly AND so stylish that they're completely blowing my mind. Can you even deal with how hot the combo of fluorescent green and linen is? Appropriately, this open-toe, stiletto Mary Jane is called "Energy."

AND, you can get 20% off at Nimli.com with promo code SPRING09!

Appropriately, I could SO see Keri Hilson wearing these... AND she has a song called "Energy." I love a coincidence!

Keri Hilson - New Music - More Music Videos

How I Feel About This Be&D Studded Wallet Should Be Fairly Obvious

($325, Be&D)

It's called the Garbo wallet, but I think they really meant to call it the Tamar.

($535, Be&D)

The Kiss clutch brings tears to my eyes... It reminds me a TEENY bit of the Gustto bag I bought from Tobi.com when it went on sale, and BTW, it's awesome and was worth EVERY cent. Still, this Be&D bag is high. fucking. art.

+ More stud lust.

Thoughts I'm Having About French Connection Stuff At 6PM.com

My thoughts are... LOOK how cute this stuff is!

($106.47, French Connection, 6pm.com)

CUTEST little party dress!!! And HI! It has WIDE straps... for ladies who... need straps. And I even wrote about its cousin, the "Seasonal" skirt!

($101, French Connection, 6pm.com)

Go ahead and TRY to tell me that this black cotton trench isn't cute... SEE! YOU CAN'T!

($121, French Connection, 6pm.com)

$120 for black leather boots? Are you KIDDING me? Wait... you're NOT kidding! (BTW, I'm anxiously awaiting the arrival of my f-troupe black leather boots!!)

($77, French Connection, 6pm.com)

Sweet! I like the perforated detailing on the toe. Sorta Mad Men-y too, no? And lots of sizes left! YAY!

Stripey Cotton Dresses: Yet Another Reason Winter Could Hurry Up And Get Gone

($34, The Ryde)

Now I, personally, would wear some mid-calf black leggings with this super sunny stripey tank dress from The Ryde. But I'm kinda boring sometimes. Suit yourself though.

Moschino: NOT CHEAP

Moschino: Chic, yes. Cheap, nuh-uh!! I mean, seriously: I want these shoes. I would wear these shoes for my wedding:



Perfect color, fun detailing, 3-inch heel. YES PLEASE! And yet: FIVE HUNDRED BIG ONES, y'all!

The search continues....

Voulez-Vous Coucher Avec Moi, Jeffrey Campbell Boudoir Boots

($199, Jeffrey Campbell, Modcloth.com)

Total wack-ass neo-Victorian dream boots! As Whitney Houston said in the beginning of "So Emotional," -- I don't know why I like it... I just do!

Whitney Houston |MTV Music

You NEED To Get This Jones New York Hooded Leather Bomber Jacket IMMEDS!

($229, Jones New York, Smartbargains.com)

DUDES! This brown leather bomber jacket -- WITH HOOD -- is the BEST way to drop the F-bomb on winter, once it's actually warm enough to wear a transitional jacket. Get it! It totally reminds me of a Mike & Chris leather hoodie but WAAAAAAAY less.

Why Don't Me And My Friends Look More Like This?

Seriously, why does my life and wardrobe and all of my friends not closely resemble Barbie And the Rockers, at least once in a while? BTW, I am SO BETTING that Kanye is gonna start rocking that Ken's outfit as his next look.

Built By Wendy Sample Sale: Almost!

I've been on a strict no-buying restriction due to the w-word (see previous post), but I *almost* couldn't resist taking part in Built by Wendy's online sample sale. The prices are a bit Crazy Eddie insane, so I narrowly avoided indulging in this:



Chambray sleeveless top, $10 (orginal price: $135). Cute!

And this:



Scalloped cotton flower top, $10 (also originally $135). As my blogging partner might say: FTW! (I just recently learned what this means.)

In the end, though, once the $9 shipping charge was added, I didn't feel like making the purchase anymore. $29 more to spend on...postage? Sushi? Laundry? A new lipstick? Whatever. And then once I decided again to just say fuck it, it's only $29, the site was all wacked out. Boo! Hiss!

I easily resisted the following, since $50 is significantly more than $10, I can never figure out what to wear under cropped things, and I still haven't gotten down and dirty with my Sew You book:



Chevron cropped sweater, $50 (originally $162).

Note: The site is completely, frustratingly wonky right now. Get it together (GTG), BBW!

Bridal Binge: Wedding Dress Also-Rans

I found it. The Dress. It took four separate shopping trips and innumerable visits to sites like preownedweddingdresses.com and Once Wed, but I found it. I wouldn't dare post it, of course, in case the other One happens to look here (he doesn't want to see it till I'm walking down the aisle -- cue awwwwwwws). I will say that I got a gorgeous Anne Barge dress at the Bridal Garden, a not-for-profit resale boutique that sells only samples and donated dresses at heavily discounted prices and gives the proceeds to a charity for New York City children. I was hoping I would succeed there, and I can't tell you how great it feels to support that instead of the money-grubbing, bloodsucking wedding industry. (Getting a crazy bargain feels pretty good, too.) Here are some of the other dresses I bookmarked, tried on, or otherwise drooled over in the course of my weeks-long quest for The Dress:

Watters "Monclova" dress, about $1400. This was one of the first dresses I tried on. I love love loved the folds and ruffles at the bust; it's exactly the kind of organic detailing I was after and had a hard time finding amid all the beading and bling. And it made my waist look small. Ultimately, however, I didn't think that cool bodice was enough, and I wasn't crazy about the huge skirt. Or the price (even though, in wedding land, that is considered one-dollar-sign).


Watters "Torrean" dress, $1300-ish, I think. I started off against strapless but ended up liking a few of them anyway. And I discovered I liked lace, although in retrospect I think it might have been more that I just preferred lace to beading. I'd done my research and put this one on my radar, but it was a little too sparkly in person.


Mary L. Couture bias-cut gown, sadly unavailable. This would have fulfilled one of my major requirements: boob-flatteringness. I wanted something like that: sexy but not slutty. My mom and I might have disagreed on whether this dress falls into that category, but it's worth noting that she, a proper Englishwoman, opined without prompting that I would want something "sexy" and seemed to agree that that was okay. I do not believe I ever heard my mother utter that word before in my life, and I was mildly scandalized. Moving on...


Alfred Angelo style 1127, price unknown, but you can get it on discount sites for a couple hundred bucks. Another boobalicious style. Loved the top, wasn't crazy about the length. Would be perfect for someone who wants a shorter dress but prefers something more modern than the whole vintage/tea-length look, though.


Nicole Miller aqua one-shoulder gown, $620. Not technically a wedding dress, but who cares? I love the one-shoulder look and the crinkliness, and this definitely has a wow factor. Nicole Miller has a ton of sleek, elegant, white wedding dresses in addition to this series of stretch metal ones, too.


BCBG one-shoulder silk gown, $358. So elegant. Hilariously listed as a "mother of the bride" gown.


Jessica McClintock "Charleze" dress, $167. Before I got my dress, I was thinking how fun it would be to have a costume change and be able to dance freely, in a short dress, at the reception. Now, I just can't imagine taking off my dress for anything.


I even think it's better than this Oscar de la Renta embroidered number, a heartbreaking $10,500...


...which sort of reminds me of this Kelima K gown. We saw a whole bunch of their pretty dresses this weekend at the New York Wedding Workshop Signature Event this weekend, and by we I mean Tamar and me, not me and my betrothed, although there were plenty of couples walking around sipping the cocktails and tasting the cupcakes and sitting on the rented white furniture. Only one person, who shall remain unnamed, was blithely tossing piping-hot crab poppers hither and yon. Good times!


But I digress. There were a few dreses I ripped out of magazines more than once (note: I LOVE wedding magazines! weird!), so that I now have multiples taped into my all-important wedding binder. This Melissa Sweet Cosimma dress is one of them. God, I love floral appliqués.


This crazy Betsey Johnson gown also appears several times. I just love the ruffly ridiculousness!

Another heavy hitter in the bridal world is Lela Rose, whose feminine dresses are so pretty and unusual (for bridal). I saw a couple of her dresses at the Bridal Garden, but unfortunately, they were too small. Some examples of her work:







Finally, there is a Seattle designer who makes some truly amazing nontraditional gowns. Tamar, you must get one of these Wai Ching dresses! It's a little scary ordering a custom gown over the Internet, but if they did it right, how awesome would some of these gowns be? The color, the detailing, the sheer fun!

Joan Holloway's Gold Pen Necklace: FOUND!

OMJ! It's Joan Holloway's pen necklace!

($20, 1928, 1928.com)

So, follow me here. Bust Mag scoped this on 1928.com, then Coquette picked it up, and then I saw it on Budget Fashionista. Anyway, not that I'm opposed to dressing under the influence of Joan Holloway, but I wouldn't wear it because it's a little overly specific. I AM, however, glad it exists in the world.

Also, check out the Don Draper couch I found at CB2. Thanks, Racked, for giving it some lurfs.

Who Won The FashionBinge Postcup Giveaway Anyway?

One of my favorite newer bloggers, Lani, of Sugar Rock Catwalk won the FashionBinge Postcup giveaway!

Check out Lani's personalized Postcup (I blurred out her address so no one stalks her!) and her cool blog post about it. Then go get your own Postcup at Bailey Doesn't Bark!

Congrats, Lani!

Amazing Deal, Total Steal: Pour La Victoire Ballet Flats For $46!

I usually like bold, fun, slightly ridiculous shoes -- statement shoes (??) if you will? And I will. And I do. But there's something lovely about these understated, simple Pour La Victoire "Bijou" ballet flats. They're a nice, peaceful off-white with suede trim. I'd be feeling them with, say, some grey skinny jeans and a pumpkin-colored top, perhaps? Or maybe a turquoise one? ENDLESS possibilities.

($46, Pour La Victorie, Muito Fina)

Alexander Wang Denim Hobo Bag: Yes, You Read That Correctly

Generally speaking, bastardizations of and permutations/ variations on denim make me nauseous. But for some unknown reason, I love this "leather denim" Alexander Wang hobo bag. What IS "leather denim"? I couldn't tell you and maybe I wouldn't even if I knew. I just know I cannot resist this Alexander Wang "Donna" hobo and all of its zippers and compartments.

($825, Alexander Wang, Satineboutique.com)

Oh yeah, that price tag makes it pretty easy to resist.

More Rubber-tastic Vivienne Westwood Anglomania and Melissa Heels At Epaulet!

Epaulet, one of my favorite Brooklyn boutiques, now carries Vivienne Westwood Anglomania x Melissa Lady Dragon glitter heels:

($149, Vivienne Westwood for Melissa, Epauletshop.com)


($149, Vivienne Westwood for Melissa, Epauletshop.com)

My faves are the black glitter heels -- lotsa fun options for summer nights -- wear 'em with little dresses or jumpers, jeans and a black tank. But still, my all-time faves are the Lady Dragon Anglomania heart-toe heels.

Beklina Brings It: Rachel Comey, Ivana Helsinki & Virginia Johnson Picks

Organic-inspired online boutique Beklina has three pieces that I would slash a priest's tires to get my hands on:

($540, Rachel Comey, Beklina.com)

I'm not in love with the draping or ties, but they are removable. Otherwise, I love the contrasting color variations on the same fun floral prints.

($98, Ivana Helsinki, Bekina.com)

Love this super-fun feather print tee by Finnish designer Ivana Helsinki.

($360, Virginia Johnson, Beklina.com)

This Warrior dress is totally different from what I'm seeing from Virginia Johnson. I love the combo of yellow and grey (as evidenced by these Kenneth Cole heels and this Velvet Torch jumper and Love Squared top), and this amazing Virginia Johnson silk dress is like a Keith Haring come to life.

Rachel Comey Wright D'Orsay Pump On Super Sale!

Hey here's an idea! Why don't you pick up these perfect Wright D'Orsay pumps by Rachel Comey since they're on sale and all?

($156, Rachel Comey, Lagarconne.com)

I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream For Paul Smith Heels!

Seriuosla Janola, what's not to love about these fun Paul Smith heels in yellow patent leather? I love the Pantone-y piping that keeps them from looking too Eastery egg-y, and the whimsical curved heel.

($198, Paul Smith, Zappos)

Non-traditional Wedding Dress Picks By Nanette Lepore!

Dudes, whether or not she knows it, Nanette Lepore is SERIOUS about making the BEST wedding dresses for non-traditional brides. Check it:

($252, Nanette Lepore, Bluefly)

The "Sequin Starlet" dress is a little too Bollywood in green, but I love it in smoke. And if you're not sooo in loves with your upper arms, these slightly longer sleeves are perfs.

($159, Nanette Lepore, Bluefly)

The "Pave Diamond" dress is so cute for bridesmaids or an outdoor picnic-style rehearsal dinner, you know?

($695, Nanette Lepore, Shopbop.com)

Sure the "Sahara" dress is, well, black, for one, but I think it's perfect for a beach wedding or a rehearsal dinner for a beach wedding. It also totally reminds me of a dress that Betty Draper would wear on the French Riveria. BTW, this dress also comes in neon pink, but I can't stand it.

+ More non-traditional wedding dresses! And an awesome one from Lela Rose!

Samanca Silver Hoop Earrings From Bad Joan

Can't be mad at these great silver hoops from Bad Joan. They're by Samanca and they're beaded and wrapped in waxed linen and remind me of the Chan Luu earrings I wrote about back in November.

They look super versatile -- good for hippie chicks or quasi-punk types -- and, um, HI! They're $35!

($35, Samanca, Badjoan.com)

Remember, you need Bad Joan's discount code to get the deeeeal, but unlike, say, a sorority, everyone can join. Join Bad Joan anywhere on the site where it says "click for the discount code." Easy peasy!