Let This Photo Of Blanche Devereaux Punching A Fisherman Be Your Guide

Hi, anyone who still reads FashionBinge or arrived here because you're a spambot! I swear I'll get back into blogging/ word-vomiting soon. Right now I'm face-deep in some books, travel (Minneapolis, Chicago, Gulf Shores Alabama for work) a container of Talenti (Banana Chocolate Swirl, specifically), an enormous work project, and weighing the pros and cons of getting Botox for sweat, because, EW, SUMMER. EW! Until then, enjoy this photo of Blanche Devereaux punching a fisherman in the 1989 "Golden Girls" episode entitled "Love Under the Big Top," in which Blanche and Rose stage a protest to save the dolphins.

Credit: Getty

Good Lorde, Lorde's MAC Lipstick Is A Plummy Wine Dream

Lorde is Queen, her hair rules supreme, and so it shall be that all sovereign lips should be anointed in her passionately plum "Pure Heroine" MAC lipstick when it drops June 5th at maccosmetic.com.

Futhermore: Flume's "Tennis Court" remix: Put this in your head NOW.

I'm Giving These 'In Living Color' Shirts Two Snaps And A Twist

This "In Living Color" shirt is calling my name. Actually, it's calling the name "Wanda."

Ebay

Ebay

May the best bidder with the biggest '90s bone and the burning-est desire to make it rain her tax refund win!

I Went To Austin And Left With This Avocet Ring (And A Hangover). Both Worth It

Hey fashion friends, cat lovers, compulsive shoppers. It's been a minute. Blog and blog people, I love you, but the truth is, I'm a good blogger but a shitty updater. Why? Because I'm in front of a screen pretty much from the minute I wake up to the second my head (and, let's be honest, my drool) hit the pillow. I need a small break from Interneting to put my face in things that matter -- food, yoga mat, cat bellies, husband's neck. So, it's not that I don't love blogging. I do. I just give no fucks about pageviews. Caring about pageviews on your personal blog is like caring about your weight. It's just a number. Why are you worrying about number when you could be... not worrying and eating instead? It's just that I love the sky and talking to people in person, and traveling, and not Instagramming stuff for a second and instead trying to commit things to memory instead of screens. I've written thousands of blog posts in my head that, oddly, didn't make it to the computer tubes. Maybe if I get one of those Google Glass thingies that scream "DON'T HAVE SEX WITH ME PLEASE EVER BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE SEX BECAUSE I'M WEARING THESE COOL VIRTUAL GLASSES AND DON'T NEED SEX OR HUMAN CONTACT. I'M HAVING SEX IN MY MIND."

I digress, as I so often do.

I just got back from a week in Austin for SXSW. I'm sorry, body, for the fried things and nicotine and cider beer or whatever I put in you. I'm sorry. The ciders were free and I was feeling fuck-free.

I worked my ass off, but I had a little downtime which I spent shopping and strolling on South Congress Street, where, at the suggestion of the lovely ladies at Paige Denim (shout to them and the guys of Immaculate, who threw an excellent, definitely not Kosher dinner party), I stopped by Feathers Boutique, which is where this gorgeous Native American tribal head dress ring by Mexico City jeweler Avocet imprinted itself in my mind.

Stunning, right? I haven't worn silver in ages, but this ring, like 75% of jewelry I shouldn't be impulse-buying, did.

Other reasons you should check out Feathers, besides their jewelry selection -- including my girl Katie deGuzman's K/LLER jewelry -- they carry Alchemy tees, which have cool retro-luminati designs on tees softer than the little pinky/ white part of a kitten's ear.

I got this one in black and white:

Also spotted at Feathers: Mustard-colored Mickey and Minnie denim. 1994 me would've creamed my jeans for these.

Buy these? I did not. Missed connection.

Finally, in my South Congress rampage (I gave myself a one-hour break between work and work), I stopped into Prototype Vintage, which is IMPECCABLY organized, super clean and priced to move. Picked up two '80s vintage tees -- an all-over print Mickey shirt and these super '80s illustrated ladies on a Las Vegas souvenier shirt. I wish everything still looked like this.

They were both under $40 -- certainly not thrift store prices, but definitely not New York "vintage" prices, where used things cost more than new things.

On that work tip, I did some interviews for the mtvU Woodies. Jack Antonoff of Bleachers was particularly cool:

Here we are making emoji faces:

That's a Reiss "Springstreen" blouse (it's the most beautiful, breathable and unwrinkable thing in the world) and a Lionette Frida necklace if you give fucks about that sorta thing, and JC Ramos of Blo Austin did my hair, and he's a follicular genius and a total doll. I'm supremely into Jack's grown-up Suddenly Seymour style, by the way.

You need to listen to his song "I Wanna Get Better" RIGHT THE FUCK NOW and see him on tour by any means necessary.

Oh yeah, here's me, and, much more importantly, goddess queen superlatively superior human being Iggy Azalea serving Dolly Parton "9 to 5" realness.

 Finally: DOGS! Austin's got the BEST ONES!

THESE GUYS ARE AVAILABLE FOR ADOPTION! Contact AustinPetsAlive.org

+ AUSTIN MUSTS:

SHOP
* Feathers Boutique:
1700 B South Congress Ave. and Milton
Austin, TX 78704
512-912-9779

* Prototype Vintage:
1700 1/2 South Congress Ave and Milton Street
Austin, Texas 78704
512-447-7686

* Uncommon Objects: BEST VINTAGE/ ANTIQUE SHOP IN THE WORLD, NO CONTEST.
512 S Congress Ave
Austin, Texas 78704
512-442-4000

HAIR GAME STRONG:
* JC Ramos/ Blo Dry Austin
1611 W 5th St, Ste 145
Austin, TX 78703
512-355-1256

EATS
* Uchiko
* East Side King
* Liberty Bar
* Lamberts Barbecue
* Houndstooth Coffee
* Flat Track Coffee

Toy Syndrome's Beetle Beanie Is So Cute It's Almost Creepy.

$25, Toy Syndrome. Use promo code "buggin" or "friend1" on Etsy, which is what I did.

And the hat tip literally goes to the inimitable, impossibly short, unstoppably stylish Sara Zucker for dusting the cobwebs (topical insect reference, btw) off of my unawares, accessory-deprived brain and letting the light of this insect-infested beanie in. 

It's by Toy Syndrome, aka Natalya Nyn, who, like me shares an affinity for teeny toys and bubblegum machine figurines... And who, unlike me, sewed a bunch of lizards onto a half shirt that caught Lena Dunham's eye, and the rest is archival "Girls" history.

This Jac Vanek Pizza Shirt Is The Most Important Pizza Shirt Ever

I'm starting the new year off resolving to post more about PIZZA. Let's begin!

Fuck any and everything else you've heard about pizza. Nothing else matters but the aphorism brilliant stated on this Jac Vanek pizza shirt: "The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I asked for pizza."

$44, Jac Vanek

Instagram Marshmallows And Vibrating Animal Butt Phone Charms: All Of Your Holiday Gift Dilemmas SOLVED!

Is there a better world to live in than the world that affords you the ultimate first-world opportunity to print out your Instagrams onto EDIBLE MARSHMALLOWS!?!? (Also, lest you ride me about excess and holidays being about giving and not getting, and Americans are terrible consumerists, which is, to be fair, true, I donated to UNICEF, WNYC, God's Love We Deliver, and usually give to Be The Match around the holidays, so get bent.)

THIS IS A REAL AND TRUE THING!

Boomf: Your food and cat photos or whatever, printed onto marshmallows for just $19

Witness the miracle fusing of technology and gelatin by giving the gift of Boomf (these people were 1000 percent correct in assuming there's a market for Insta-mallows because, hi, me), where you can print out nine Instagrams onto REAL, EDIBLE MARSHMALLOWS for approximately $19. What you do with them is your business. Is it weird or cool that I want to print out a bunch of Peeps and make super meta marshmallows?

Not feeling Boomfs for that hard-to-shop-for person you don't really like anyway? Get to gettin' to these vibrating animal butt charms for phone. And if you don't know anyone who'd like either of these gifts, then you're probably hanging out with the wrong people.

Rakuten.co.jp, via Rocketnews24