Friday, July 14, 2006

Defending J.Lo

My esteemed colleage T-Lo(quacious) recently made a disparaging comment about the design skills of Jennifer Lopez. Fie, I say! This is clearly poppycock, for girlfriend makes some cute-ass tops. I actually ordered such an item several months ago (a strappy red going-out top intended to be worn to an actual club, the likes of which I had not set foot in in years — the things we go through for our marrying friends!). However, the top was delivered to my magazine's fashion department, of which I am not a member, and never seen again. See? Even fashion people secretly like J.Lo, enough to steal her wares from humble copy editors! I submit the following as fine examples of the J.Lo aesthetic, and urge you to shop J.Lo proudly:



This is a pretty basic top, but love that twistiness at the neck. I was just thinking I need way more low-cut tops; this might be the ticket. $35.



Yes, this is really J.Lo! Tie-neck top, on sale for $14.99.



The sort of top that'll make you look like you might be hiding a pregnancy, or at least a few extra cheeseburgers. But cute, no? Ruffle top with beads, $59.



Aren't horseshoes considered lucky? Better safe than sorry. I'd wear this over cropped jeans, possibly while on the 6 (get it?), and then no one would, like, push me in front of an oncoming train (a frequent fear). J.Lo to the rescue! Halter top, $49.



And oh my God, this strapless top is so precious I sort of do want to die for it. Luckily (see??) it can be mine (or yours) for $59. And it comes with the belt! Amazing.

Of course, there's also this:



Slutty crochet halter, $51.99.

Caveat emptor, brahs and sahs.

3 comments:

Tamron Lohan said...

The views and opinions expressed in this post are solely those of the author and do not reflect the views or opinions (or good taste!) of this blog's other author.

melanienyc said...

i too ususally hate the designing of j to the lo

with that said, i like the twisted top and i like the heidiness of the last strapless top. the slutty top is something i imagine is on the wardrobe racks over on the sets of some cinemax-grade film and yea the rest of them, i would just send right on back to her.

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