Is A Non-Slutty Leather Dress Just Too Much To Ask For?

Is it really? All I want is a bad-ass leather dress that doesn't make me look like a prosti or a Hell's Angel or both.

(Apprx $199 USD, Warehouse.co.uk)

Apparently Warehouse has the perfect LLD, but they don't ship to the US. Warehouse, I'm sorry I totally didn't help you stay in business when you still existed in New York. Maybe if you had awesome shit like this back then I would've dropped the zero that gets the hero. #totallysuperficialretroactivereversebuyersremorse

($202, Mango, Asos.com)

Mango's little black leather dress is OOOkay, I guess, but it's too boxy. I need me a pretty little girlie cut to offset the bad-ass leatherness.

($271.96, Muu Baa, Asos.com)

... And yet, this leather garbage bag/ upside-down hot air balloon is far sadder than Warehouse not shipping to the US.