Oh Look! THERE's My Waist... In 7 For All Mankind Charlize Jeans

($215, 7 For All Mankind, Macys.com)

So, it turns out I DO have a waist! I had COMPLETELY forgotten! Because, like an idiot, I've been wearing my jeans at like, Kevin Federline lower depths, all down around my hips and shit. Not like total B-girl or anything, but it HAS been awhile since I've gotten new jeans, and some of my older ones are, um, well loved and not exactly crispy?

Fortunately, I recently got a pair of 7 For All Mankind's new Charlize trouser jeans in the dark Soho wash, and they're sitting high and dry, accentuate my waist, and lifting my flat rear without cutting off circulation in any crucial places where circulation really needs to happen. The Charlize jeans are thick, slightly stretchy, ultra slimming, and suck you in and keep you there. They're professional but not in a boring way. And the craziest/ best part is that they're super comfortable. Of course, I had to get about 18,002 inches taken up, but there's still a nice flare there that doesn't venture into "C'mon Get Happy" Brady territory. Essentially, much like the woman they're named for, 7 For All Mankind's Charlize jeans are perfection.