These 3 Pairs Of Sunglasses Need To Find Their Way Onto My Face

So many excellent new sunglasses for summer. Let's begin with these three pairs, which need to report for duty on face immediately. All three, on my face, all at once (which coincidentally sounds like a line from a Terry Richardson deposition -- and if that hasn't happened yet it's just a matter of time). 

$128, Kate Spade, Nordstrom

The relief I'd feel pulling the trigger on these Kate Spade Aviators that I don't need probably far outweighs the guilt I'd feel buying a pair of sunglasses I clearly don't need.

$280, Karen Walker, Shopbop

Ugh. I can't with these cream Karen Walker sunglasses with ARROW DETAILING on the arms. Can you? No! You can't! No one can! It's a problem.

$389, Agent Provocateur 

Agent Provocateur's purple "Poke Me" sunglasses (hee!) are the platonic ideal of old-lady chic. And if you're concerned that $389 is expensive for sunglasses, consider this: they're a buck less than Agent Provocateur's crystal whip! Is that a deal, or is that a deal, nu?

Agent Provocateur's New Bridal Collection Means You Gets To Be Christina Hendricks On The Cover Of 'New York' Mag

If you, like me, Stan for Christina Hendricks (Joan from "Mad Men") AND like olde-tymey-looking lingerie, then rejoice! Agent Provocateur's new bridal collection is a.) gorj, and AND b.) goes up to an E cup. Often, if you're a chesty lady and you walk into a nice lingerie place, they all but LOL in your FACE and basically suggest you sew two C cups together and pray. So an E cup is, if you'll pardon me here, a "big" deal for lingerie. Especially bridal. My favorite of Agent Provocateur's new bridal line is the super retro "Thelma" skirted sweetheart body suit below. It's $390. Oh yeah, and I SWEAR I'll soon stop being lazy and post some wedding pix already, speaking of bridal shiz.