Tuesday, December 11, 2007

UPDATE! KIPPYS RUINS CHRISTMAS!

Per my last post on holiday handbags, check out some Kippys atrocities before the holidays are shut the shit down. Here's why:

($2190, Kippys, Bellasbarn.com)
OMG. If Joan Rivers died and were reincarnated as a jacket, I'd assume it'd probably go something like this. It's like Vegas barfed all over a Little Miss Texas pageant. Per the site's description: Kippy's Black Acid Washed Leather Jacket with Jet Swarovski Crystals. This Fitted Blazer looks fabulous with any denims, pants, and skirts.

DENIMS? Whatever. That's the least of the problems here.



($525, Kippys, Bellasbarn.com)
I don't know Mariah Carey personally, but I feel confident that even back in her glitteriest of butterfly phases, not even SHE would've worn this piece of sparkly trash.



($699 -- down from $995, which makes it a total steal! -- Kippys, Bellasbarn.com)
Now, I'm not even 100$ hardcore anti-fur, but I can't believe rabbits died for this fucking horseshit. I'd toss a can of red paint at the offensive bitch carrying this shitbucket just for having such piss-poor taste.



($1099, Kippys, Bellasbarn.com)
According to the item's description: Kippy's Handbag with Beaver Fur w/Pita Stitch and Side Pockets. Fur Handbags are the In Style Magizine Must have for 2007-2008. Um, something tells me that this would NOT make InStyle's It List. The only It List this bag would make would be a S-H-It List. Also, the ACTUAL name of this shitsack is "Beaver Bag." Seriously. It sounds like some fraternity hazing stunt. Okay. I can't take it anymore. I think we've had enough.


And to make up for the damage I've done to your eyes, here's an audio treat: an MP3! "Christmas Is Cancelled" by The Long Blondes. Don't say I never gave you anything.

2 comments:

ambika said...

Oh my god, Beaver Bag. Snort.

poop magee said...

how is the beaver bag over $1000!? is it made out of beaver?

hey, do one about snow appropriate gear. because i like barking orders at you. you write, i read! and buy.

like i can't tell you this in person.

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