SOOOOOO, long story longer, after that, I stopped into Ann Taylor because they had sparkly things in the window. AND OH MY GOD. Ann Taylor has SEEEEEEEEEEEERIOUSLY stepped it ALL the way the fuck up and gone from Grandma to Grand-NAW! Like, such an epic makeover it's like when Sandy goes from boring to whoring at the end of Grease. Except obviously neither Sandy nor Ann Taylor is/ are whores.
Okay, check out ALL of the super cute things I found at Ann Taylor online that I would wear in a single solitary heartbeat.
WHO among us would NOT wear this amazement chunky statement necklace? NOT I! I can tell you that much.
Um, I'm sorry, but ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I can no longer separate rational needs from irrational wants when confronted with this metallic jacquard leopard-print skirt, Ann!
Lately all I can think about is Glee and sequiny things. Unsurprisingly. This sequined tank top is as perfect as Puck.
($175, AnnTaylor.com)Hi! A whole Chanel-inspired outfit! Bar jacket and all! I ADORE YOU, ANN!
ANN! WTF! I LOVE this grey slouchy boot! Seriously!? Jamaican me CRAZY!
Ann! It's cool, not tryin' to put a rush on you. I just wanna let you know that I got a crush on you.
ANN! It's like you CREPT into my closet and KNEW I have the BEST orange suede vintage jacket that this would complement PERFECTLY! GAH! Ann, it's like you know me better than I know myself. You devil, you!