Ooh, Yay! Here's That Slutty Mesh Bodysuit I'd Been Searching Haplessly For

AND it's on sale! HUZZAH!!

If You're Gonna Spend A Honit On Jelly Shoes, Spend It On These Orange 4.5-Inch-Heeled BBs

I feel there was a time and a place in her career when Beyonce would've worn these hot pink and orange Vogue jellies. Specifically, 1999. Even more specifically, the "Say My Name" video. That time for her is over, but that time for me is basically now and forever.

$100, Vogue, Urbanoutfitters.com

Adidas x Opening Ceremony Rod Laver Striped Hi Top Sneakers: Gone, But Not Forgotten

+ UPDATE: Urban Outfitters has the Adidas x Opening Ceremony Rod Laver sneakers in WOMEN'S sizes! 10% off with promo code "WACKSLACKS." DONE! Thank you, Based God! +

$175, Opening Ceremony x Adidas Rod Laver Hi tops, Urban Outfitters

When will I learn that spending two months deliberating in a most Woody Allen of fashions whether or not to buy a limited edition pair of sneakers will almost always result in a frantic demon drop down the rabbit hole/ Baby Jessica well of the deepest depths of online destinations and shoe store phone calls, only to discover there's no light at the end of the tunnel, and the the Adidas x Opening Ceremony Ron Laver striped hi tops are sold out. I have the opposite of FOMO. I have ToMO -- Totally Missed out. If you or someone you love know where to find a men's size 6, hollar at a Jew. By the way, the girl at Opening Ceremony was a total doll and called both New York stores to see if there were any in stock. The girl at the Adidas Originals store, was, sadly a besnatch. 

If you need me, I'll be consoling myself with my $2.99 CVS avocado deep conditioning treatment. 

The Best Shit I Bought, Wore, Did, Ate, Etc In 2012

Okay. Yay, happy 2013! Given that I have more than enough running observations, statistics, judgements, trivial/ triflin' concerns, condemnation, ambitions, thoughts about cats, musings and mumblings going through my brain in just the time it took me to type this sentence, I'm therefore not usually prone to public reflection, review, or navel gazings, such as the year-in-review-style posts that fill up my Facebook feed at the end of December/ beginning of January. I'm not trying to hate. It's just generally not my thing. But, like, if I'm going to reach back into the bowels of 2012 and extract a common theme of the year, then YOLO: Why not take a minute to look back at the year that was (and all of the shit I bought), and raise a glass to 2012?

All joking and unicorn heels aside, one of my daily goals is to always remain fully aware and appreciative of my countless blessings, from having a loving relationship, friends so incredible that I sometimes feel like I should pay them for the privilege, and living in a city I love in a place I'm happy to call to home, to the little things that aren't little at all, when you take a step back and really, profoundly consider them -- just waking up in the morning, and having a healthy body and healthy mind. Truly, in the midst of the daily grind of flying out the door, rushing to work, being annoyed by the 47 billionity thousand trillion things that can annoy you on the ride to work, it's a privilege and a gift -- even on a bad day -- just to get out of bed every morning and stretch out four limbs that can carry me anywhere. Those things alone are truly more that some people can say they have. I don't care if that sounds emo. Sure, 2013 had some crap moments. Every year does. But I got to spend another year on Earth (thanks, Mayans!), and given the alternative, I'll take it.

Okay. So, let's talk shopping and other superficial stuff!

+ Best thing I bought in 2012: My Chris Habana Nostradamus necklace: I stopped into American Two Shot -- FINALLY -- last month, looking for gifts for my sister. A few hundred bucks later I walked out with this Chris Habana necklace for myself, and a pizza iPhone case for my sister. I am a TERRIBLE person. But I LOVE this piece probably way more than any healthy person should. This was my one really indulgent impulse buy of the year, and, in the words of Katy Perry, no regrets, just love.

+ Second-best thing I bought in 2012: Urban Outfitters BDG chambray button-down: Being a woman, ahem, cursed with a more than ample endowment, if you will (yes, I'm talking about the curse of the big-busted woman, but I'm trying to be discreet, because I am TOTALLY A LADY!), I truly believed I would NEVER own a decent button-down. But holy shit and Gloria in excelsis Deo! Urban Outfitters' chambray button-down came around and turned my world upside down because IT FITS, Y'ALL!

+ Third-best thing I bought in 2012: CW-X sports bra: DUDES. My CW-X sports bra changed EVERYTHING. Again, see above. If you're over like a C cup, sports bra issues can be THUH WORST. CW-X is by Wacoal, and they know what's UP. I found that the cup sizes aren't true to your real non-sports bra cup size, so the size I bought was smaller than my real size, but I don't care, because it fits like it's true to size. I can't remember what size I bought, and quite frankly, if you're that interested, then you're probably a real creeper, so fall back. But if you're not a creeper, try the CW-X VersatX Support Bra or the CW-X XTempo from Paragon or ShoeBuy.com. Zappos carries some, too. You might have to shop around a bit to find the right size and fit, but it's worth it. Trust. Seriously, after going to Lululemon and asking for a sports bra in my size and basically getting this from their "enlightened" employees:

... Finding CW-X sports bras was like a revolution.

(More favorite/ best things after the jump!)

Urban Outfitters' Leopard Print Army Jacket? HYFR!

$79, Urban Outfitters

I spotted -- HAR! GET IT? "SPOTTED"? -- a girl wearing this very leopard print army jacket in the Financial District this morning, I Googled "leopard print army jacket" AND IT WORKED! I LOVE when Google and your mind magically get along like that! Minesies!

In this election year, I can proudly say I firmly stand behind any quirky variation -- leopard prints -- on a basic theme -- standard army surplus jacket. So let's raise a toast to my first fashion purchase of the fall! HYFR!

* Disclaimer: While I DO LOVE Drake and this song, I think this video is insipid, disrespectful sacrilegious bullshit.
Drake ~ HYFR Feat. Lil Wayne from OctobersVeryOwn on Vimeo.

CYBER MONDAY SALES BE CRAY-CRAY!

Guys. Put down the pepper spray and check out these SICK Cyber Monday deals. Put some cash back into our weeping economy.

Check out this list of Cyber Monday (heh) promo codes and sales at some of my favorite shops and brands.

+ Mario Badescu
10% off + free shipping AND a free gift for orders over $50.
Code: cmonday

+ Gap, Banana Republic, Old Navy
30% off
Code: hugecyber (LOL!!)

+ Lands End Canvas 
30% off + free shipping
Code: drumstick PIN: 1211

+ Solestruck
50% off sale shoes!
Code: finalsale50

+ Sephora
Free shipping over $50
Code: shipnow

+ Alex & Chloe
30% off select items

+ Urban Outfitters
Free shipping

+ Joe's Jeans
30% off your purchase + free shipping
Code: Cyber30
(sale not applicable to fifty five colors jeans)

More Sparkly Shoes That Aren't MiuMiu

More ways to own sparkly shoes that aren't $8900 or whatever patrons of Miu Miu's glitter booties are willing and able to spend/ go in debt for. Urban Outfitters' glitter booties are festive and are less than $100, so you can put that eight grand toward a partial down payment on a house in some parts of the US... or on just a kitchen cabinet to fold yourself in half and sleep in if you live in New York.

$69, Deena & Ozzy, Urbanoutfitters.com

 

$69, Kimchi Blue, Urbanoutfitters.com
 

The glitter platform is holiday-ready, but the pretty peach upper is super spring. See? A shoe for all seasons!

State Of The Shoe-ion Address... Or: WHY I HAVE FOUR TOTALLY DISSIMILAR BUT TOTALLY AFFORDABLE PAIRS OF SHOES ON MY LIVING ROOM FLOOR

You guys. I'm a simple woman with simple needs: quite simply, I need a LOT of shoes. Fortunately, I don't have expensive taste in shoes. They just have to be cute and possibly even a little absurd. As you can imagine, this has manifested itself in a problem that enjoys overwhelming volume but an alarming lack of consistency: since I rarely spend over $100 on a pair of shoes (a lot of my shoes are barely $50), I've amassed a huge shoe collection that makes about as much sense as your typical Lady Gaga video -- fun to look at it, but let's not kid ourselves. Like the "Born This Way" video, if you looked at my entire shoe collection, you'd leave like "well, that was kinda cool to look at for a few minutes but... I don't get it. Which is how I found myself in my living room tonight, surrounded by the four pairs of totally dissimilar shoes featured above.

Let's go from left to right.

1.) ASOS Superstar Tapestry Heels ($78.57): Dudes. These are FLORAL TAPESTRY heels with A GOLD STUDDED TOE. It's the mullet of shoes. Party in the toe... business in the back? Eh? Anyway, they're increds. Except I DO call bullshit since they were on sale when I bought them and now they're mysteriously not on sale. Ahhhh capitalism, you crazy scoundrel you!

2.) Jeffrey Campbell Downtown booties (no longer available): I bought these on a trip to Need Supply when I was visiting my sister in Richmond last year. Real quick: hat tip to Need Supply. They're like an indie Urban Outfitters, except they don't steal people's designs. Anyway, they were on sale for $49 from $130. That's called usin' your noodle. OH, and they're SO comfortable. I walked about a MILE out of my way lost en route to a VH1 taping yesterday, so I learned this the hard way. (The hard way that comes from not giving a shit about reading maps!) Seriously, these shoes are like crack. Or Pinkberry. Straight men fall out of their cubicles to ask me about them. My only regret is not buying the orange ones when I had the chance. Man, hindsight. She's such the little fucker!

3.) Matisse Nugent booties ($193) : The nice people who do Matisse's PR reached out and sent me these, and the second I opened the box and took in the holy sight that is their Nugent bootie, this was pretty much my reaction:




Like Cup Stacking Girl, I too achieved something great! SHOE NIRVANA (shirvana?) These booties aren't just ANIMAL print. They're DALMATIAN print. (Not real dalmatians, obviously! They're IMITATION DALMATIAN. From the NATION of faux DALMATIAN.) And they're so perfectly '70s Marc Bolan shaped, which is what I really want in a bootie, you know? Intensely, almost preternaturally perfect. These booties are the Ryan Gosling of footwear. Like HOW could anything be that perfect?

These Are The Definition Of Crazy Pants

$98, Urban Outfitters

The only explanation for the print on these jeans is this: I think someone spiked a Petri dish of one-celled organisms with MDMA, photographed them under a high-powered microscope, and a pair of REAL-LIFE crazy pants were BORN! The worst part is I actually kind of love them.

FashionBinge Goes FABB + Words To Live By By Joan Rivers (AKA: Zen And The Art Of Fashion Blogger)

The faces of FashionBinge! Catherine (Mary-Kate) and Tamar (Tamron)

This past Tuesday I had the pleasure of attending Lucky Magazine's first-ever Fashion and Beauty Blog Conference. It was basically summer camp without the Birkenstocks. With Joan Rivers (more on that tk). I was honestly a little hesitant when I first RSVPed "yes." Why? The landscape of fashion blogging has changed so much in the five years I've been doing Fashionbinge. I was (pointlessly, as it turns out) a little curious as to whether it'd be a bunch of chicks vying to out-dress each other and namedrop designers and stuff. That's actually not really been my experience with fashion and beauty bloggers -- the ones I know are generally great writers and intelligent, media-savvy girls whom I now consider friends first, beyond just blogging. But I started fashion blogging back in 2006, when the market was less crowded, and the "'Net" (who even still calls it that??) was literally smaller as was the metaphorical net you could cast and not reel in nearly as many fashion bloggers and blogs as you can today. 

Five years ago, when FashionBinge was born, there weren't really fashion bloggers as models, fashion bloggers in front rows at fashion week, fashion bloggers as household names. Fashion bloggers on billboards in Times Square. Fashion bloggers in the Times. And FashionBinge still carries that scrappy, hey-we're-just-a-fun-little-blog-on-Blogger aesthetic and mantra. That's important to me. We (Catherine and I; we started FashionBinge together, and these days I post regularly and handle the nuts and bolts, while Catherine still chimes in on occasion) are not trying to be anything we're not. I just like to post some fun boots or a necklace I either bought, would very much love to buy, or would never in a month of Sundays buy. I'm not expecting an email from Garance Dore begging to photograph me, or Marc Jacobs to name a bag after me. Supermodels don't show up to my birthday party. 

I can the number of fashion shows I've been to on two hands and the number of times I've been to "the tents" probably on one. I've never been flown to cover shows in Europe where I've landed, gone right into fittings, and then taken a private car somewhere where I boarded a boat to watch models wear couture on a gondola. I do sometimes receive access to cool things or receive cool things, and I'm always appreciative of those things. I'm proud of the things I've worked very hard for, and I'm appreciative of any opportunities that come my way. Because really, no one deserves any special privileges simply because they have a blog. (Or because they're a really good athlete or went to a fancy university or know someone famous.) It's important to work hard for things, be appreciative for anything extra you've been given, and while you should have high expectations for yourself, you shouldn't expect that things you haven't worked for will simply be handed to you. (Celebrity gifting suites being an exception.) Maybe that's the immigrant's daughter in me speaking, but I really believe in those things.

Anyway, I'm not a fashion encyclopedia nor an expert. I probably know more about blogging, writing, and social media better than I can reference, say, the difference between Chanel's and YSL's 1999 resort collections or wax poetic on the merits of Mulberry boots versus Burberry boots or tell you whether a Balenciaga bag is better than a Birkin (as I will probably never own either).

I just know what looks good on me (and when to admit that something doesn't), how to shop for it, how to get the look for less, and how to navigate mainstream stores and select things in a way that doesn't scream HI I GOT THIS AT THAT STORE IN THE MALL WHERE EVERYONE SHOPS. And I know how to mine the Internet for hidden gems. Especially when there's a sale involved. I'm a great style curator. I hope that if and when you visit FashionBinge, you experience a little "Ooh, look at this fun thing you dug up" sensation. That's one of the things I love most about blogs. 

So, when it comes to fashion, the essence of FashionBinge is that it's not how much you spend, it's what you spent it on and how you wore it. And did you feel great in it? Yes? Awesome. As Santino Rice sagely said on the second season of "Project Runway," "Lighten up! It's just fashion!"

That's all a roundabout, reflective way of explaining why I was really happy that the FABB Conference was a celebration of fashion and beauty bloggers of all types, stripes and, well... hype. There were gorgeous glamazon-y newcomers with legs longer than my entire body and modeling deals. Girls with superstar style sense. Girls whose fashion blogs demonstrate their hilarious, irreverent take on fashion. Budget bloggers. Accidental cewebrities. Super shoppers. Discount doyennes. Hustlers and reticent bloggers. And the best thing was that there was a feeling of democracy, support, and a recognition of the fact that, at the heart of this diverse group of bloggers, there's one thing everyone has in common: basically, everyone who blogs does it because they love it. Fashion (and beauty) blogging is a crowded, busy, well-accessorized market, but there's room for all.

Anyway, I just wanted to really share that takeaway: everyone at FABB was extremely friendly, super supportive, and felt like the offline extension of what the whole online experience should be: a celebration of community, passion, and personality.

But more importantly... HERE'S WHAT I WORE! Har.

 

1.) Lazerade Manilow Top: This blouse is covered in a really cute star print, and it fits perfectly, (so curvy girls, take note.) It's from Urban Outfitters and has gone on sale since I purchased it a week ago. If I'm not feeling lazy, I'll go back to the store and have them credit me the difference. Ladies, NEVER be afraid to post-sale shop! It works! Saved myself $112 at Diane Von Furstenberg after I found the exact same dress I'd just purchased from their boutique on sale at Nordstrom. You work hard for your money, so never leave it on the table.

($29.99, UrbanOutfitters.com)

2.) Uniqlo jeans! Comfy and stretchy, but desperately in need of a belt.

3.) Chie Mihara Catame Bow Heels:

($361.33, Chie Mihara, Endless.com, courtesy of the designer)

I've had these Chie Mihara bow heels for years, and they're far chicer in person. They go with absolutely everything and fance-up an outfit in as much time as it takes to zip them up. 

4.) Pade Vavre horse necklace (duhr).

Okay. Here are four things I took away from the Lucky FABB Conference:

Urban Outfitters MADE Me Buy These Black Boots! + PROMO CODES!

DAMN, you Urban Outfitters. You led me right back into temptation again, didn't you? Knowing full well that I'm nearly powerless to you. Especially when you dangle a promo code in front of my nose.

While shopping for THIS awesome gift for my husband (I don't wanna post it directly because he reads this from time to time), I kinda had to get myself a reward of some sort for finding him such an AWESOME present.  Enter, these black leather hiking boots!

($88, Ecote, UrbanOutfitters.com)

I love the wooden stacked heel and the metal D-rings. Hopefully they'll deliver in the cuteness category once I receive them.

($39.99, Cooperative, UrbanOutfitters.com)

I also fully support these really sweet Sherpa-lined Cooperative black boots with a stacked heel. They're on sale!

AND promo code "HEREYOUGO" saves you $25 on $100 and more. GET IT!

Santa, Please Put These Carin Wester Klea Sherpa Ankle Boots In My Stocking

($429, Carin Wester, Urbanoutfitters.com)

Granted, Santa, I know I don't "celebrate Christmas" or "believe in you," but perhaps if you could please somehow fit these perfect, putty-colored Carin Wester wedges into the stocking I do not own, I could make a gracious exception. How does that sound? Also, seeing as how they're $429, I will completely understand if this is my only stocking stuffer. I think that's more than fair.

I Heart Pendleton Everything! + Weird '90s Flashback

I don't necessarily think Pendleton's Native American designs really flatter me, but that doesn't stop me from admiring their resurgence and their wonderfully wooly winter undertones.

Two Pendleton pieces that are on my fantasy shopping list (things I'll never buy yet would graciously accept as... you know... donations or something) are this Pendleton wool and leather weekender bag. It's so ruggedly handsome. It's like the Javier Bardem of bags, you know? But less scruffy:

($216, Pendleton, Shopepaulet.com)

From the sturdy, strapping leather details to the please-don't-get-me-all-super-dirty metal feet, to the luggage tag, I fully endorse everything about this Pendleton bag (as well as the lovely Epaulet, which you should visit in person or online.)

I ride a bike approximately once every... never. Seriously, I NEVER ride a bike. I haven't been on one since approximately 1997, and that was only for a brief moment to determine that up until then, I hadn't been on one since 1991 and since it was 1997, well, I sure as hell wasn't about to take up bike riding again. Hm. I wonder what I was wearing in 1997. Probably some really horrible "relaxed fit" DKNY jeans with zero shape. And a thrift store t-shirt that said "John Deere." And possibly a flannel.  Lovely. ANYWAY, I completely digress. If I WERE to ride a bike, Urban Outfitters' Pendleton bike (available early October) would be it.

BTW, here's me in the '90s. SO style-less that I HAD to share for the sake of comedy. Can you believe people actually COME TO ME for style advice now?!? Oh, and I'm pretty sure that was my "going out" shirt, and it was special because it was one of the sole things I owned from The Gap. I took good care to iron it. And those spoon-shaped gold sunglasses? THERE ARE NO WORDS capable of describing "the bad." I remember being CRESTFALLEN when they disappeared... Little did I know it was truly for the best. Live and learn, people. Live and learn.

Two PERFECT Charlie Girl Silky Tops For Fall

I love a silky top like it's my damn vocation. They feel easy breezy in the summer when you wanna "fance it up" a bit but don't want to melt, Wicked Witch style, in a pool of your own perspiration. And they're the BEST to layer with in the fall, with a leather jacket and some black skinny jeans. Oh yeah, and I also get lots of questions about what to wear with booties or ankle boots -- ding ding ding! A long, loose silky shirt, skinny jeans, and some great black or grey booties. Or, tuck it into a pair of well-tailored wide-legged trousers for a Marlene Dietrich/ modern-day Charlie Girl look.

($174, Gemma, Farfetch.com)

OY. LOVE the watercolory interpretation of snakeskin on silk.

($68, KNT By Kova & T, UrbanOutfitters.com)

SeriouslyK, PLEASE wear this with a leather jacket or chunky black motorcycle boots so as to avoid looking like a referee. Or an employee of Foot Locker.

Minx Mani: Meh? Uniqlo: Go!

Last night, after kind of a crappy day, I headed down to the Madewell store for an event they were having: 20 percent off jeans (and their jeans are pretty cool, I must say), other unmentionable sale stuff, and, most important: a free Minx manicure. I got there right at 7 and placed my name on the list, calculating that I had at least an hour to check out the Costello Tagliapetra collection at Uniqlo. Excuse me while I digress....



There was only a couple of racks left of the stuff, but quite a number of different dresses. I tried on almost all of them, so attractive is the drapiness. However. The material on most of these dresses (the cutest ones) is paper-thin. If you have any bumps or bulges at all, fuhgeddaboudit. I did get the chartreuse dress above, in olive green, for $29.95. It's a thicker cotton, almost sweatshirt material. Win! Also got a flouncy T-shirt dress—Uniqlo is pretty much ground zero for T-shirt dresses. Also pretty much my new favorite store.

I made it back to Madewell just in time for my name to be called. You could get the Minx, a metallic gold or silver foil, on one nail per hand, and the rest polish. I weirdly chose my index finger (shoulda gone with the ring finger, I think) and selected a dark purple for the polish. It looked pretty cool, I think. I would have loved to have had the thumb Minxed as well. So supershiny and durable-looking.



HOWEVER. The manicurist told me the Minx would last four days, because (according to a commenter) they weren't putting a coating or cap on it because it was a freebie. Now, I don't know if my manicurist was particularly unskilled at Minx application or what, but this shit was chipping after TWO HOURS. All I did was go home and eat sushi and go to bed! This should not happen! This morning? The Minx nails are totally chipped and dinged up, and lustre-free. What the hell? I'm REALLY glad I didn't pay the usual $60 for a full Minx manicure. I'd be pissed. Those of you who a) don't believe me and b) like crazy/stupid patterns can now get a Minx kit at Sephora. (Why the hell not in gold and silver and, uh, solid colors?)

Anyway, some cute stuff I didn't buy at Madewell:


Canon messenger bag, $128. So effin' cute. Want.


Bensimon elastic sneakers, $55. Cute. Easy. Summer. I decided to stick with my $17 Urban Outfitters slip-ons, though. LOVE THOSE.



Legere cardigan, $68. I don't know why this picture makes it look so garish. It's much softer-looking than it appears here (though still a bold color), but I loved the subtle contrast in colors between the body of the sweater and the trim.



Brunch shorts, $59.

Urban Outfitters Is Really Doing Some Fantastic Things With Shoes Right Now

I'm feeling such primal urges toward shoe shopping right now. Mommy! What do my feelings mean? (Will I still be a virgin?) I think I need to fantasy shop to fulfill my urge to buy a shitton of shoes. Like just fill up a cart with these shoes, and then close it, the way ex-smokers will pretend to inhale a lit cigarette. Deep breaths, deep breaths. Okay... GO!

($48, Urbanoutfitters.com)

Um, hi. These neutral suede heels are just $48. It's like they WANT US TO BUY THEM or something! How sweet would these look with grey tights? They also come in grey, but they're SOLD OUT. BOO HISS!

($68, Deena & Ozzy, Urbanoutfitters.com)

Granted, I wouldn't be able to walk from my bedroom to my apartment door without falling in these wedges, but I would if I could. They remind me of Rick Owens' crazy platform wedges at one one-billionth of the price.

($58, Urbanoutfitters.com)

Eee! I LOVE a white macrame bootie! They remind me of the Steve Madden "Skiip" woven Oxfords I love and have worn into the ground.

($89.99, Matiko, Urbanoutfitters.com)

Is there anything more FOSSE than a black suede platform? IT'S SHOWTIME!

Looks Like a Blazer, Feels Like a Cardigan!

Now that's my kind of blazer!



Silence & Noise sequined cardigan, $42.

Also...BREAKING:



Free People sequined blazer, $168, for when you just want to spend a little more.

Got $38? You NEED To Get This Rhinestone Necklace.

It's kinda hard to find a rhinestone statement necklace that doesn't look like a cheap pile of plastic shise or something you'd buy in plastic bubble wrap in the "fun" aisle at the grocery store. So please do yourself a favor and check out this Urban rhinestone necklace. It was designed by the ladies at BleachBlack.com.

($38, Urbanoutfitters.com)

WTF Files: Cheap Monday Polka Dot Jeans

($49, Cheap Monday, Urban Outfitters)

Look, I've worn a lot of Really Stupid Shit. Usually on purpose. Usually at parties, and usually because that Stupid Shit's only gotten funnier as the night's gotten later. Also, I can take a joke. And I LOVE Cheap Monday. But the joke's gone too far this time. These polka dot jeans are an affront on good taste. Seriously, can we just not and also say we didn't?

10 Jumpers Under $100!

Hey guess what. I FREAKING HATE hot weather.

What I'm trying to say is, check out 10 really cute jumpers that flatter lots of body types (also, can I just say, I HATE the term "bodycon." It's dumb. Please stop saying it) AND cost less than $100! Also, why do they call them jumpers? Playsuits? Whatever. I just wanna spend all of the days between now and October laying around in airconditioning and wishing I lived in John Ritter's apartment in Three's Company.

($93.78, Totem, Asos.com)

L-L-L-Love the lips!

($31.26, Asos.com)

HORSES? On a JUMPER? Could America GET any better?

($44.99, Modcloth.com)

I am thisclose to buying this.

($69.99, Modcloth.com)

One of my favey things about jumpers: they're thisclose to being pajamas.

($97, Fluxus, Pinkmascara.com)

This one would be so cute with a tiny tank underneath. A tank of YOUR CHOOSING! You can just DO WHATEVER YOU WANT!

($98, Gestuz, Asos.com)

Your garden variety harem-style jumper. No big whoop.

($20, Postlapsaria.com)

So it's technically a dress, but whatevs. It's late.

($39, Lulus)

Fun! Picnicky!

($69, Sass & Bide, Shopbop.com)

Mmmm. Love me some elastic waistband!

($88, Lark & Wolff by Steven Alan, Urban Outfitters)

The sorta-fancy, dress-up-for-work yachting jumper. For your business meetings. On a boat.

Night night!